Help! Jesus Wants To Take My Wife! And She’s Looking For Him Too!

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Paralyzed By Prophecy And Love

The following question comes from a friend who has given me permission to publish what they sent.  I have formatted the question but have accurately represented what was said:

I am struggling with an issue that I cannot seem to get passed. My wife is on fire and full of joy at the soon return of the Lord. I think of never holding her again, holding her hand, or kissing her cheek. It saddens me dearly.

Along with that the idea of some family and friends not making it to heaven is another issue. How can I find the joy of heaven feeling these things? My wife says everybody has the options. It’s their choice. But that doesn’t help at all, it makes it worse. Separation from God will be bad enough but Hell forever is almost to much for me to handle!

I do not want to disparage the sentiment from someone’s place of love and desire for their loved ones to experience the joy of salvation.  However, there are several points that I want to address here that I see routinely in the ministries I serve in.

Idoling In Love

In Romans 1:22-25 we see this:

“Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.” (ESV)

We’ve all heard this sermon before.  Anything that takes place over your priority with God is an idol.  But sometimes, idols aren’t as easy to give up like the ones you can just cast into the fire.  Sometimes, those idols have the face of your wife, your children, or other loved ones.  It may be your favorite preacher, the theology book you always quote from. It may be always needing to create example lists with three points.

With absolute respect and love, you are making an idol of other people. Your focus should ultimately be on Christ and wanting to spend the rest of eternity with him. Yes, of course, we want our wives and family and friends, and really; everyone to experience that too. But when we put that in front of Christ’s return we put others in the place of where God should be (which is idolatry). Our marriage should point others to our coming Groom and we need to be facing forward even more so.

A Wedding, Not A Funeral

In John 3, John the Baptist compares Jesus to a bridegroom and we (His people) are the bride. A bride doesn’t bemoan the life she’s leaving behind. Before the big day, she isn’t hanging out with her friends to discuss other men or reminiscing her single life.  She counts down the days until she marries her ultimate love.  You wouldn’t want or respect someone who would do that. You want your future wife to be as oriented to you as you are to her.

When we find ourselves asking God not to come back until whatever event takes place we are placing Him in second pole position behind our idol.  Not yet, Lord.  Just wait until I get married or I get my driver’s license or until I finally visit Ireland. We are to find joy in Christ and do what John says in John 3:30-31a:

“He must increase, but I must decrease. He who comes from above is above all. ”

Our schedule of church activities. Our curriculum to make our children graduate with double doctorates at age 12. The three-month early plan for Christmas. When we fail to sincerely add after each item “…for God’s glory!” we are a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.

A Change In Relationship Status

It’s not hard to see why this mentality of asking Jesus to tarry a little longer comes from.  We love our wife/children/family/friends/life/etc.  For the sake of this, let’s say, wife.  I love my wife. I never want to stop being married to my wife.  And yet, Jesus says the following:

For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven. And as for the resurrection of the dead, have you not read what was said to you by God: ‘I am the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob’? He is not God of the dead, but of the living.” And when the crowd heard it, they were astonished at his teaching. (Matthew 22:30-33, ESV)

Our problem with our insight that creates the idol is that I can’t imagine moving from a mindset where not only is my wife no longer my wife. How can I change myself so that I do not desire her in the way I do now?  In fact, not only do I no longer desire her, but I have replaced her with something better and something perfect. I have replaced her with Christ and she has done likewise.

Cross-Eyed

Like trying to find a metaphor for the Trinity, we stumble when we try and put ourselves in this mindset.  We are fallen creatures who need radical transformation to approach the throne of God.  Sometimes we fall into sin when we try to go about it our own way.

We must continue to look upon Christ.  It is in that motive that we find our confidence in our salvation; not some event or prayer that I remember.  I am saved by Christ’s perfect work on the Cross, not a moment I kneeled and cried in my room.  Christians might disagree how or when Christ will return, but it is orthodox teaching that Christ can return at any moment He chooses.  We should desire that quickening and we should cherish that truth with our loved ones this day while we can.

 

 

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